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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Hollywood's Oscar Show Gets 60 Valuable Seconds From Me

In an era when Hollywood came very close to honoring as best picture "Brokeback Mountain", a pro-gay movie that did not have great box-office numbers (BTW, a movie I did not see*), it appears that the nominees fit a certain political ideology. Did that ideology overcome aesthetic elements in those nominations? This is my sense.

As well, I watched slightly over 1 minute of the Academy Awards show. By the time I got down to my TV set, I witnessed one John Stewart joke, lame but inoffensive, and then had to switch the set when he said the next presenters were Keannu Reeves and Sandy Bullock. I cannot listen to Reeves---he may be very nice and I have enjoyed some of his action movies---but I preferred whatever was on the history channel or ESPN. During a commercial I went back and saw some rap group screaming about something. I could not understand what they were saying and gave up. Anyway, the time-out was over in the Gonzaga game so I switched off the awards show.

I am not sure if the speeches were of the expected anti-Bush, "Republicans are creeps and Joe McCarthy is what is wrong with America today" type that all of these progressive thinkers normally spout. I have not read of anything particularly offensive in reviews. I understand the actors preened about, portraying their superiority and greater sophistication over the yahoos in the Middle States.

Dennis Prager provides a fictional Oscars acceptance speech that we are likely to never hear from this crowd of sophomoric thespians. First, he thanks the USA for providing us all (and actors in particular) unprecedented freedom. He thanks the troops for personally shedding the blood to keep us safe.

Then the fictional actor says:

I also want to apologize to these troops for my profession not having made even one motion picture about any of the heroic American fighters in Afghanistan and Iraq. This country is fighting a war, Hollywood. You may think this war is unwise, waged under mistaken, or even false, pretenses. And as an actor in Hollywood, you are overwhelmingly likely to hate this commander in chief. But even the men and women of Hollywood must recognize that America is fighting the worst people of our time, people who hurt every group Hollywood claims to care about -- minorities, women, gays -- people who engage in the sins Hollywood most professes to oppose -- intolerance and violence -- far more than anyone else on the planet.

In another era, when what many have labeled "the greatest generation" fought the German Nazis and the Japanese fascists, Hollywood made movie after movie depicting that great war and our great warriors. And Hollywood showed freedom's enemies as the cruel and vicious people they were. We have not produced one film yet depicting this war in positive terms or one depicting this generation's enemies of freedom as the cruel and vicious people they are.

In Hollywood, they consider each other brave for giving speeches with which they almost unanimously agree. There are no legal repercussions for their comments but they see America's disgust with them as McCarthyism. No, Hollywood. In America we are not forced to attend movies we choose not to see. Americans have chosen to reduce their movie-going because the subjects of these films are obviously antagonistic to their views. Why should you spend $20 to hear a harangue about why you are bigoted and intolerant? Since we know that is how Hollywood feels, why should we waste our after-tax money?

* My excuse for seeing none of the nominated movies is not homophobia. It is that I spend hundreds every year on children's movies. The only adult movies I saw were Finding Neverland (loved it), The Aristocrats (some foul language but funny) and the best movie in many years The 40-year Old Virgin. Actually, now just I drop the wife and kids off at the theatre and go to the book-store for a few hours to read.

My nominees for best movie are The Pacifier, Herbie Fully-Loaded, Narnia and Cheaper By the Dozen 2.

Best Picture: Narnia
Best Actor: Vin Diesel
Best Actress: Lindsay Lohan
Best Supporting Actor: Eugene Levy
Best Supporting Actress: The Girl Car

6 Comments:

At 11:51 AM, Anonymous grad03 said...

What does it say about Hollywood and women when the best supporting actress you can come up with is a car?

Even as a joke, rather sad. I would like to see the movie your imaginary winner is proposing.

 
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